Mediation is a topic with profound implications. Therefore, it is imperative to understand how it works and how it can benefit a person’s life. Two loved ones quarreling can be complicated, but even something as simple as two coworkers arguing can be challenging to deal with every day. Hence, learning how to use mediation in a person’s life can profoundly affect their everyday life. As a result, one can search for the top ten best mediation books of all time, organized here in October 2020, for your reference.
Forgiveness is a word that has a variety of definitions, meanings, and connotations. Depending on personal beliefs and values, forgiveness has different roles in peoples’ lives. Therefore, when someone tells you they forgive you, there are a multitude of meanings that may be behind it. These varying views of forgiveness can best be seen by the plethora of ideas and motivations offered by the authors of our in-class texts.
If women mediators are successful, we are either the Sally Rides of mediation practice (doing it weightless, backwards, and in heels) or we are segregated in “pink collar” specialties—family, elder and employment law—all of which focus on people rather than on commerce or finance.
Empathy is an essential tool in mediation, both for the mediator and hopefully a quality the participants develop as well. Mediators recognize, unless we want to act purely as evaluators (and even then the capacity for empathy is still important), that we need to try to empathize with the needs and feelings of both sides in every case, to build trust and encourage understanding.
People fear peacemaking. They fear the uncertainty of the outcome. They doubt their own abilities to make peace. They often doubt the competency of the peacemaker. They have high levels of anxiety because everything seems confused and chaotic. In addition, their pre-conscious brain is signaling danger and invoking freeze, flee, or fight responses. This is normal and expected behavior. Nevertheless, you, the peacemaker, must not be caught up in the swirling emotions of the parties. The best and only strategy is to maintain a “non-anxious” presence.
Increasingly, corporations recognize the value of a Program for managing workplace conflict that precludes litigation. These systems are designed by trained ADR consultants retained by the company on a contract basis. In order to implement such a Program, there must first be broad “buy-in” from all segments of labor and management.
Behavioral Psychology is a well-known method used across the world for everything from training dogs to treating phobias. B.F. Skinner is one of the most widely recognized contributors to Behaviorism and brought us the idea of “operant conditioning”—the idea that we can condition ourselves and others through the use of reinforcements. Operant conditioning suggests that we can systematically extinguish or increase a particular behavior through the use of negative reinforcements, positive reinforcements, or even the absence of reinforcements.
Remember when you were a kid and your mom forced you to ask a group of the “cool kids” to play? Close your eyes… you remember. As you walked toward the cool kids, your mouth felt dry. Your palms got sweaty. Your heart felt like it was going to burst from your chest and your breath came in short gulps. You approached the kids and finally gathered the courage to ask in an awkward croak, “Can I play?”
I first entered a Courtroom as a lawyer almost thirty years ago. Since then, I have always known that I chose the greatest profession in the world, particularly for me. I remain energized and engaged; there is no “burn out” in sight even after many years of late nights, emergency motions, difficult clients, less than civil opposing counsel and the never ending quest for a “balanced life.”
Organizations spend a significant amount on developing and administering sophisticated feedback processes such as 360 degree processes, in order to nurture and develop their precious talent. Consultants are engaged to develop models and staff trained to administer and debrief them.
Those who anticipate the likelihood of future conflicts, and create procedures to deal with them when they occur, are much less likely to find the tensions of subsequent conflicts destroying their ability to continue to work together.
The average working American devotes more time to work than to family, leisure, or even sleep. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, time spent working beats time spent sleeping by an entire hour. Given the amount of time and energy we spend at work—plus the fact that conflict is a frequent and natural byproduct of human interaction—it is no surprise that the workplace is a petri dish for all types of disputes and complaints.